Isn't it a best practice to refer to incidents by date?
Because the Highland Park shooting occurred on an annual, national holiday, during a beloved community tradition, it is important to begin distancing the tragic events of 2022 from future Independence Day events. The holiday will continue to be celebrated by many, and we anticipate that as time passes, individuals who may not feel comfortable celebrating now will reclaim the holiday and its traditions in the future.
Why is it recommended to use just "shooting" instead of "mass shooting"?
In evaluating options to refer to the incident in the long-term, the City conducted research into the associations and attributes people connect with the naming of any incident. This research indicated that articles and commentary tagged with “mass shooting” frequently focus on the shooter. It is important to center victims and minimize focus on the perpetrator.
Isn't it harsh to say "lives taken" or "people killed"?
Using language that accurately conveys the severity of the situation is important in communicating the gravity of what has occurred. Shying away from the truth of their deaths doesn’t honor the memory of those who were killed or the grief of their family members; it just makes conversations more comfortable for those who are talking about them. Softening the language diminishes their story.
Why should the term "anniversary" be avoided?
This recommendation is in line with best practices suggesting that it’s important to choose words that lack emotional weight where appropriate and possible. Neutral language, such as “one-year mark,” helps individuals dealing with trauma to create emotional distance, which in turn is helpful for long-term resilience. In addition, “anniversary” carries a connotation of celebration, which is inappropriate in the context of a tragic event. Using the term “one year mark” acknowledges the passage of time since the shooting while still conveying a sense of solemnity and respect for the victims and their families.
What should I do if a victim expresses a preference for a term that the City suggests may be troubling or problematic?
When speaking with victims, it’s always a good idea to mirror their language. This demonstrates respect and empathy. For example, if a victim uses the term “anniversary,” it’s OK to use that term when speaking with that person. However, when speaking to a broader audience (such as on social media), where you do not have that personal connection, it’s recommended that you follow the guidance above.
Given the recommendations above, what are some ways to be empathetic to friends and family in need?
- Listen without interruption.
- Don’t equate your experience with theirs, even if you were together at the shooting.
- Be vulnerable! But confirm the other person has the bandwidth to discuss before you share your own feelings.
- Validate the way they’re feeling.
- Avoid saying “I feel the same way.” Everyone feels things differently – even the same emotions. A good way to share your feelings in response to someone else’s story is to say, “I’m feeling [emotion] about this, too.”
